Ahead of the Game

Fall has returned and with it Jeff's favorite season, college football season. Unfortunately this year his favorite team seems destined to totally suck. As he settles in his favorite chair to watch the game, Jeff is about to unknowingly create one of the most sucky days ever.

Dealing with the game is bad enough but Gina, his incredibly sexy wife, is certainly not cheering him on or cheering him up. She won't even bring him a beer when he asks, continually telling him to get it himself, that she has cleaning to do.

Thankfully he thinks, this is the perfect opportunity to try that new Womote 3000 from Trance-tory Technologies. He was half drunk the night he ordered it but as he recalled the big tagline was that it allows a man to "Always get Ahead" at least where women were concerned. There was some science junk about it being tuned to the female mind and her bio-rhythms or something, but all he cares about is that like a fancy sonic pet remote, it reportedly will have a woman behaving and following his requests.

All Jeff wants at the moment is a beer to help take the sting off this sucky performance on screen.

Jeff's about to discover that more than the aim of his favorite team's quarterback is off today as he just keeps missing Gina when pointing the remote and firing the little laser beam light at her. It keeps shooting out windows, reflecting one way or another and letting her go on and continue her obsessive cleaning routines.

Little does Jeff know that as those misfires with the Womote 3000 send that beam anywhere but Gina, the laser beam does in fact cross paths with other women.

Kimmy Wheeler bicycling down the sidewalk near Jeff's home is blinded by one beam from the Womote 3000 and falls from her bike. Checked on by a nearby neighbor and her favorite teacher Mr. Lansing, her mind suddenly craves a thirst quencher like no other as the confused teacher is helpless to resist her oral advances.

Further attempts at simply getting his wife to bring him that beer have everyone from a flight attendant on a circling jet above to a couple of older girl scouts falling victim to desires they never realized they had. Yes, Jeff discovers, some days truly suck... though sucking might not always be so bad.

In the end, Jeff's team may have no shot at scoring but Jeff sure does, even if Gina has company on the receiving end. As for his beer... well somethings might just remain a mystery in this fall Klassic.

Dettagli