Baz, Ant and the Boys

The summer started with 'Brown Sugar' and it ended with The Who at The Oval cricket ground, where they turned live rock music into a mesmerizing, pulsating miracle. And bound up in this heady atmosphere of 1971 was the pure, unadulterated love of football and all its absurdities, where sex, snakebite and the slide tackle scythed their way through everything. Shortfall College, a gaunt and brooding building, reminiscent of the Industrial Revolution cut a dark slice of shadow across the South London sky. It was here that an oddball, dotty selection of students set out in search of the Holy Grail the South London Intercollegiate Cup aided by spurious tactics and hindered by countless distractions. From Marlene, the landlord's wife, a goddess and vixen with a predilection for ice who couldn't keep her hands off Baz, to Norman, a ringer, with a rather unhealthy lopsided grin who completely snapped when trying to remove an opponent's ear with his teeth. Driven ever onwards by The Bear, their captain and inspiration, and Baz, his defensive henchman, they try to rein in the Ant, who possesses the aerodynamics of a spear and a footballing philosophy whereby the ball isn't absolutely necessary.

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