In 1996, Jacob Chitto Miller began to lose his ability to meditate, and then he lost it completely starting in 1997. Why did this happen? What spiritual values and truths can we learn from his journey of his struggle within? One thing we learn from Sri Chinmoy, Jacob's spiritual Master and Inner Guide, is the value and divinity in one of his aphorisms which states:
"The blows of my Master
I take as most beautiful flowers
Given to me by my Master."
(Seventy-Seven Thousand Service-Trees, #19203)
and yet, throughout the years, Jacob often did not abide by this way of thinking and had to deal with some difficulties as a result. Isn't it true that if you retaliate in a destructive manner towards someone who has humiliated you, violated you, or disturbed you in some way you are acting like a terrorist? Despite the difficulties and consequences Jacob has had to face for past behaviour, including acting like a terrorist, Jacob still hopes to realize God in this incarnation. But he has to get his meditation back first.