Robert Visconti is an antique dealer living in a museum-like house filled with the souvenirs of his many travels. After two divorces, he decides to take the same systematic approach to love as he does to his collection. He publishes a personal ad, hoping to find someone who would love him, care for him - and appreciate his collection of art and artefacts from around the world.
He receives a call from a woman who is not exactly an art expert: Brandi West, an exotic dancer who has recently moved to LA in an attempt to restore her shattered confidence and become a Hollywood actress. Even though Brandi has a somewhat limited vocabulary and no knowledge of the art world, Robert is instantly attracted to her.
Can Brandi get her confidence back and learn to use long words? Can Robert change his snobbish approach to dating? Will a Chihuahua-obsessed diva come between them? All of these questions are answered as the couple finds out what it means to be "Very Much Alive."