When it All Falls Apart Again is the true story of Lisa Gawlas spiritual awakening. The story begins with her account of how her life is literally falling apart again, loosing her home, her job, and her will to live. In a deep depression, she decides to fix things once and for all by converting her car into a gas chamber, but a startling vision of her son doing drugs saves her from that fate.
No stranger to the downs that life can bring, Lisa was born into a dysfunctional and cruelly abusive family. As a parent of three, she tried to treat her kids with as much love as she could muster. But she had never learned to love herself.
She knows she needs to change, but doesn't know how until she discovers a beautiful key to transforming the pain and turmoil that defines her life. For Lisa, that key is meditation.
It all began on a whim, when she constructed a homemade Ouija board to ask a few questions of the spirit realm. Some "strange coincidences" around the house, and a book given to her by a friend about the paranormal, has her curious enough to try too speak with spirits. When her home made Ouija planchette, an upside down empty pudding cup, leaps into action spelling answers from beyond, Lisa's world changes forever.
The dialog that came from that first tippy toe into the world of spirit gives her the motivation to continue to seekand seek she does! First stop for Lisa, learning more about meditation. She tries every way possible to make her connection to spiritand finds it's only in the bathtub that she is able to meditate. With a great deal of patience and perseverance she connects to a peaceful inner plane, where she meets her spirit guides, including the spirit of Jill Cadee, the woman who had visited her homemade Ouija board. She forms a deep bond with her guides, who give her something she had never experienced in her life; unconditional love.
Through her bathtub meditations, a new world begins opening up for Lisa. A world in stark contrast to her day to day existence, which is still ruled by depression and dysfunction. While exploring and learning about spirit in meditation, Lisa is not removed from life's problems at all. In fact, it seems that every time she reaches a new spiritual understanding, another challenge comes along.
The next two years of Lisa's life are a whirlwind of shuffling between rented rooms, the homeless shelter, and even an off season hotel. The characters she meets along the way range from shady to Saintly, with a few who might have been certifiably insane. The cycle of life falling apart has become more like a crazy speed dating round. But at each of these stations on her path, Lisa maintains her calm, the gift of meditation serving her well.
Lisa has finally shed the feeling that she is simply a victim. The weight she has been carrying around all her life has lifted. In her meditations, she's met many new guides, including Sananda, who gives her lessons in a type of healing called energy healing. Lisa is in love for the first time in her life, with life itself. As she heals, the deepest darkest traumas from her past come to the surface. The molestation, abuse, and neglect, laid out for the world to see. Through her emotional processing, the old angry Lisa is dying, and she finds peace, forgiveness, and a connection with Spirit she could never have imagined.
At the end of this true life story, Lisa celebrates her triumph, bringing the darkest of places within her into a new world of light. She has overcome personal tragedy, learning to master her depression and anger with grace and humility.
Lisa's journey of meditation and learning to trust in Spirit is not only inspirational, it is transformational. Candid and raw at times, and written in a personal unique style, it's a mesmerizing story, openly and lovingly shared, and not to be missed!