When you're trying to change your life, please understand that your number one enemy is not going to be another person. It's not going to be your past. It's not going to be situations you have no control over.
Your number one challenger is going to be yourself. Wrap your mind around this reality. We are all creatures of comfort and somehow some way, we are going to undermine, sabotage or stymie ourselves from the progress we could otherwise be achieving.
The good news is the more you challenge yourself, the closer you get to that breakthrough. Don't give up. Focus on what you stand to gain instead of what you stand to lose.
You know that since you're taking this training that there's something fundamentally wrong with some aspect of your life. Start there. Start with the realization that there is a better way forward.